Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
