youre lurking in front of me
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
