I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
