I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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