actually, I'm a sock model
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
