found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
