Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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