The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
