You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
