They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
i think i just lost a toe
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
