On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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