Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
