Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
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