He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
