a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize