at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
