I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize