he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
