whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
