I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
no you cant smoke seaweed
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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