And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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