Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
