Have you finally orgasmed yet?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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