I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
