i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
