I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
