She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
