you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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