I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
