Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Randomize
