so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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