Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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