someone owes me an orgasm
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
