The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
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