spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
