hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
