You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Come on in and take your pants off
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