Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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