I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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