Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I just found puke in my bra..
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
