FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
