I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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