Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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