Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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