Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
