She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I love you.
Bad choice
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