Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
