I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize