I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
