I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
